Spirit in Place

Daylight arrives later and later in late autumn. It is cold when I take my mug out to the garden before dawn and look up at the fragile scrap of waning moon dancing right above my head. One must wrap up warmly to go outside on chilly October mornings, and coffee does not stay hot for long.

There is frost on the grass in the garden and on the trees. There is a splendid inky darkness overhead at five o'clock, a few hours before the sun climbs over the horizon on a day in late autumn. Jupiter is clearly visible this month - it can be seen in the east just after nightfall, but it is still a radiant presence in the darkness before sunrise. Through my astronomical binoculars, four of the planet's many moons are strung like beads across its face.

This is the wondrous region of the winter stars. The color of the sky before first light this morning was reminiscent of a favorite fountain pen ink by Private Reserve. Called Tanzanite, the fluid is a shade of violet so deep and rich as to be almost indigo in its intensity. The same manufacturer makes a gorgeous color called Purple Mojo, and I am thinking of giving it a go. All I have to do is find my favorite old Waterman pen.

Local geese are still flying merrily back and forth between the river and stubble cornfields, but many of the flights of Canada geese passing overhead now are from the far north. They are traveling at altitudes so high that one can barely see them, and their farewell songs are little more than a plangent echo on the icy wind. I bless them each and wish them well, a safe journey south and then back here in springtime.

There is something about migrating geese that always makes me restless and a little melancholy. That is at least part of the reason why I am standing out here in the darkness while the rest of the village sleeps - that and the simple fact that I love these predawn hours and the faint glow on the horizon, harbinger of a brand new day. Some part of my crone self wishes she too could take wing in autumn and fly away on an adventure. Chances are I would be winging my way north if I could fly and not headed south like the geese. I am drawn like a magnet toward the shores of distant Lake Superior, to sweeping winds and untamed waters, weathered rocks, canyons and jack pine trees. Still a wild thing after all these years...

Flight is not in the cards this year for a number of reasons, so I am considering tinting my hair burgundy, acquiring a new pair of of purple Doc Martens, finding the Waterman and sketching something in a fetching shade of ultraviolet in my tattered art journal of the moment.

As the sun dances above the horizon and I turn to go back into the house, I remember that all our northern snows are touched with violet, and I smile - there is color everywhere in autumn and winter if one only has the wits and the eyes to see it. The finest migrations of all are those undertaken within, no airplane tickets are required.

October 2010

The Artist

These are the wandering journeys of a thoughtful mind, a passionate eye, an eccentric wit and an earth loving heart through the landscape with camera, paintbrush, pen and field notebook in hand.

Catherine (Cate) Kerr is a freelance photographer, artist, graphic designer and wordsmith by calling, someone with her roots planted deep in the good dark soil of the eastern Ontario highlands. After chalking up a diversity of experience and accomplishments in the legal sector, telecommunications, graphic design, writing and marketing, she dreamed of flying solo and opened the KerrdeLune Design Works.  She has never been happier, and she has never looked back - but she sometimes wonders how she managed to survive for so many years, toiling away in the entrails of large urban corporations.
There is a wildness to these eldering days that feeds her, and she could not live without it. Nature is her canvas, and the sweeping north wind her brush - the turning seasons compose the symphony, orchestrate the score and write the choreography of her wanderings. Her happiest hours are spent rambling the woodlands, hills and fens of the Lanark Highlands, and the camera is her third eye - the clear and ever present lens through which she sees earth and the heavens, connects with them in a profound, painterly and elemental way and filters her experience of the living world. Call it simply an ongoing study in Mono no aware (物の哀れ).

A naturalist all her days, she is an ardent devotee of twilight, full moons, liminal spaces and the wild wisdom which sustains the cosmos, also confessing cheerfully to a love of old trees, meandering rivers, weathered rail fences and starry, starry nights.

She entertains hopes of authenticity, wildness, rude good health and enlightenment somewhere up the trail, but for now she is content to ramble and wonder and just breathe in and out...

For Daido Loori

Winding river, endless mountains—
the dark forest breathing mist.
There is no road into the sacred place.
It’s just that, the deeper you go,
the more wondrous it becomes.
John Daido Loori, Roshi

The verse above is taken from The True Dharma Eye: Zen Master Dogen's Three Hundred Koans, translated by John Daido Loori and Kazuaki Tanahashi, with commentary and capping verses by John Daido Loori. Daido, Abbot of the Zen Mountain Monastery (ZMM), founder of the Mountains and Rivers Order (MRO) in upstate New York and a world reknowned photographer, passed away quietly in early October of this year. He had been battling cancer for some time.

I have been sitting here looking at this screen off and on since then, feeling a little lost and trying to figure out what to write about someone who has been a major influence on my mundane ramblings for years, and my wanderings in wild untrodden places with camera, notebook and brush too.

Daido was an ardent advocate for the earth, and he saw the perfect workings of the dharma in every mountain, river, forest and limpid stream he encountered - he wrote passionately of the "inherent intelligence of wildness and wild places". I wanted more than anything to learn to see the world as he did, in all its beauty, suchness, transience and authenticity, and I still do. The news of his passing cut like a knife.

A copy of Daido's "The Zen of Creativity" has rested on my library table since it was published, and I dip into the book often for inspiration and rejuvenation. In that lovely book, Daido wrote:

"Creativity is our birthright. It is an integral part of being human, as basic as walking, talking, and thinking. Throughout our evolution as a species, it has sparked innovations in science, beauty in the arts and revelation in religion. Every human life contains its seeds and is constantly manifesting it, whether we're building a sand castle, preparing Sunday dinner, painting a canvas,walking through the woods or programming a computer. The creative process, like a spiritual journey, is intuitive, nonlinear, and experiential. It points us toward our essential nature, which is a reflection of the boundless creativity of the universe."

Arts such as painting, calligraphy, drama, music, poetry, the tea ceremony and flower arranging have been part of Zen practice for centuries, and they are treasured as as creative pursuits existing beyond the narrow and well traveled terrain of training and technique — "no mind", suchness, mystery, playfulness, and an awareness of the fleeting nature of life are understood to be as essential to full creative life as study and apprenticeship are for a beginning artist or monastic.

Visit the Mountains and Rivers Order (MRO) to read Roshi's biography and an overview of his accomplishments as abbot and founder of MRO. Then visit his online portfolio to feast your eyes on some of the most superb photographic imagery ever created by one man and his camera in communion with the living world. I miss him, but I have no doubt whatsoever that he will be back, and as soon as his forty-nine days in the bardo are up - he loved the earth too much to stay away.

Catherine Kerr
November 2009

On Balance

In early morning, mind and body fold themselves gingerly into the only meditative position they can cope with at this time in life and slide carefully into a breathing meditation. The physical position taken is precarious, ache inducing and anything but balanced, the mind equally precarious and seemingly intractable, ever inclined to wander, over the hills and far away.

When sitting, I sometimes think wistfully of the long limbed creature in her vibrant forties who scrambled easily up steep hillsides, down treacherous gorges and across soggy beaver dams in search of something, she knew not what. That younger woman was always searching for something, the sunlight falling across a wild orchid in the bog, the wind whistling through a crevice, the sound of a stream beyond the hill, a moment of radiant stillness at the top of a cliff. When younger self was engaged in these undertakings, she was in balance, and she knew it not.

Things are different now, for I am older, more brittle in my bones, less elastic in sinews and more ossified in physique. Perhaps I spilled coffee on the counter in the kitchen this morning at first light or dropped a mug and shattered it on the tile floor. This afternoon, my stiff fingers may be unable to grasp paint brush, camera or inkstone firmly, and my physical metabolism protests vigorously when I try to compel it to do anything at all beyond just sitting like a stone. For the most part, one ignores the creaks and protests of her aging organism and goes merrily on her way, only giving way a little, and only when absolutely necessary.

Balance is an elusive entity glimpsed now and then, but she always seems to be disappearing around the next corner in a graceful swirl of silken garments and tinkling bells. Sometimes I think I can hear her laughing at me as she moves away, amused by the longing of this eldering and somewhat sentient being for clarity, grace, balance and equilibrium. Let her laugh, for I am dancing onward and enjoying the journey all the way. Roots down, branches up, and off we go...

The artless suspension of the trout in its watery medium, the effortless grace of a fallen leaf resting in the patient arms of a sleepy tree in late October, the smooth stones resting easy by the beaver pond and its calm waters — these are the essence of a wild, true and natural balance. Each and every trout, leaf, stone and restless being in the great wide world is already in balance, and there is no need to pile up the stones of one's existence into an inukshuk, a trail mark or a cairn. One can grow and bloom wherever she is planted, and I have been planted in some very strange places in the last sixty years or so. As for sitting like a chunk of rock, well, I am all for that — for sitting like a mountain, a boulder, a weathered glacial erratic or a chunk of volcano, and for thinking like one too.

Whenever and wherever I enter the landscape in a spirit of openness and reciprocity, I am at home and in perfect balance, but I am always forgetting that elemental truth. Perhaps in one of these lifetimes, I shall get my act together and be able to remember. In the interim, I often think of Linda Hogan's words (from her exquisite volume of essays Dwellings) as I am pottering along, and there is a large measure of comfort in them.

"I think of the people who came before me and how they knew the placement of stars in the sky, watching the moving sun long and hard enough to witness how a certain angle of light touched a stone only once a year. Without written records, they knew the gods of every night, the small, fine details of the world around them and of immensity above.

It is a world of elemental attention, of all things working together, listening to what speaks in the blood. Whichever road I follow, I walk in the land of many gods, and they love and eat one another. Tonight, I am listening to a deeper way. Suddenly all my ancestors are behind me. Be still, they say. Watch and Listen. You are the result of the love of thousands."

November 2010

The Library Table

There are times in modern life when one needs to get away, far, far away, and there can be no distant oasis or lofty aerie more rejuvenating, no finer companions, than a good book, a mug of tea and a Morris chair.

Books and written words exercise their own discrete charm and power. They possess in abundance admirable qualities sadly lacking in our day to day existence: qualities of rigor, cadence, elegance, form, simplicity, and from time to time, incandescent beauty. Within their pages are glorious adventures, journeys along winding paths toward towers in the mist or the dragon's lair, safaris to lost and exotic cities, camel caravans bound for Persian markets and faraway mountain villages.

When one opens a good book, one can hear the lapping of waves upon the shore, the rustle of the wind in the trees, the songs of larks at sunrise and the tolling of distant bells. While reading a good book, one can leave the world behind and take wing.

Ongoing efforts to achieve a measure of simplicity and bring some order to life notwithstanding, my oak Mission library table is a repository for the paraphernalia of daily life, and it holds a lot of "stuff" other than books: spare reading glasses, keys, artist sketchbooks, fountain pens, drawing pencils and charcoal, cameras, lenses and filters, a cellular phone, scissors, bus fare and (in the rainy season) one large umbrella, usually green.

Shelves on either side of the library table are crammed full of reference materials to which we refer often, and the volumes take their time finding their way back to their appointed place. There are, of course, several books on the table itself, along with a pair of owl bookends, a scented candle, a Macondi figurine, a statue of the Buddha, a wicker basket for mail, one huge pine cone (which I simply like looking at) and a magnifying glass which conveniently disappears whenever I need it. There is no Mission style reading lamp on the library table at present because I haven't found the right one, but the search for the perfect reading lamp is serendipity, and the right lamp will turn up sooner or later.

There is no shortage of books here, and wherever one looks in the little blue house, there are bookcases: tall bookcases reaching toward the ceiling and overflowing with printed material, solitary book shelves tucked in strange places, precariously leaning stacks. Finding a particular book when one wants it can be traumatic and usually involves hours of going through all those bookcases, shelves and elusive stacks. Then, when the futile search has ended, one suddenly remembers that the missing book was borrowed some time ago, and has not yet been returned.....

If the gods are kind, and the Norns grace me with their favour, there will always be a library table here, and there will always be books on it - you can keep the big screen television screen and bring me books any time and every time. They will be my companions for as long as I am able to hold them, turn their velvety pages, peer at the lovely inky words and conjure up the thousand and one worlds just waiting for a traveler and eternal seeker to open the door and reveal the ten thousand things, rainbow colors, exotic fragrances, gentle music and ineluctable magic.

Every good book ever written is chock full of spells and cantrips. There are so many glorious words, and only a few lifetimes in which to befriend them.

Thresholds and Beyond

The expression "Beyond the Fields We Know" was coined at the turn of the last century by the Irish peer, Lord Dunsany, a gifted playwright and master storyteller, who used it in many of his tales to describe the realms which lie beyond the world we live in, Elfland or Faerie being just one such world beyond.

The Irish poet William Butler Yeats, a friend of Dunsany's, once said wistfully that he (Dunsany) wrote from "a careful abundance", and more recently, Lin Carter called Lord Dunsany a magnificent storyteller, and one of the last great masters of English prose, superior even to J.R.R. Tolkien in subtle artistry. Dunsany 's work has been a major influence on most, if not all of the fantasy writers who followed him, and "The King of Elfland's Daughter" rivals anything else ever written in the field of fantasy literature.

What separates us from Elfland and the other realms beyond the mundane one we inhabit? At the edge of the fields we know lies a hedgerow, a very ordinary sort of hedgerow containing a rustic gate. Hedgerow and gate mark the presence of a place which is not here and not there, not up and not down, not in and not out, not real and not imagined.

The hedgerow and its rude gate are a threshold or liminal space, and like all such places, they possess strong magic. They are not simply a barrier between here and there, as they seem to be at first glance, but a corridor or passageway into the unknown (but occasionally glimpsed and heard) mysterious worlds which lie beyond the mundane fields we know. Beyond the hedgerow and its gate are worlds rich and strange; dimensions which are by times, extraordinary, enlightening, creative, ecstatic, exhilarating and absolutely terrifying.

Thresholds are compelling places, and they can exert a powerful tug on the sensibilities. Every hero's journey or heroine's journey begins with one, with a call to adventure, one breathtaking, serendipitous, watershed moment in which she or he discovers a threshold, responds to its eldritch music and steps across it into another realm.

Mircea Eliade wrote of doors and thresholds as being potent mythic symbols and passages, corridors where passage from the profane to the sacred becomes possible. The philosopher Martin Heidegger described thresholds as joinings or spaces between two worlds: potent common or middle grounds which hold, join and separate two different realms, all at the same time. Thresholds are sacred places which form a boundary between what is "here" and what is "there", but they are, in themselves, neither here nor there.

"Here be dragons" was an expression used by early map makers to indicate that some of the regions shown on their fanciful creations were unknown (and possibly dangerous) territory, and they are also good words for journeying beyond the threshold. Traveler beware - dragons may await you on the other side, but there are wonders to be seen, and wisdom, adventure and enlightenment await at every turning. To cross the threshold and go through the gate is to set off on a grand creative adventure.

Within the seemingly empty space of a doorway or a threshold, one sometimes senses ancient, wild and chaotic forces in motion. Thresholds have the power to open a cranny between this world and others, letting those tumultuous otherworldly forces blow through. The ancients assuredly knew it, and they undertook special measures to secure their thresholds, carving arcane protective sigils on door lintels, placing sprigs of rowan and Brigid's crosses in the doors, burying pins and needles under their hearth stones, sweeping and blessing their thresholds and mounting horseshoes over their doorways to keep the fey without. They considered sunrise, noon, twilight and midnight to be threshold times of day when divination and magic could be worked by those skilled in such arts — such times would have been fearful for those without magical gifts or the protections of the Craft.

Sleeping, dreaming and awakening are threshold (or liminal) states, and so is the very act of breathing. Doors, windows, hearths, labyrinths, mazes, tors, barrows, stone circles, caves, bridges, crossroads and bogs are thresholds opening into other realities and other modes of being and thinking — as are quiet woodland trails, oak groves, springs and mountains. (I find myself thinking of the Queen Mother of the West and the mythical Peach Blossom Spring here.)

The old fire festivals of the Celts are perhaps the most powerful threshold times of all, for the four feasts of Samhain (Halloween), Imbolc (Candlemas), Beltane (May Day) and Lugnasadh (Loaf Mass or First Harvest) fall at the times of the year when the veils between the worlds are thin and magic is indeed afoot in the great beyond.

For students of Zen, thresholds, doors and gates are powerful symbols and metaphors for mindful living and the plane of earthly existence. Buddhist literature contains an abundance of references to such places, and there are reams of commentaries on them. In Buddhist practice, anything at all may be a threshold, door or gate, and beyond each and every one, enlightenment and the Buddha are waiting to be discovered. Through the simple act of entering a doorway or stepping onto a threshold, one acknowledges and makes a commitment to something which is at the same time smaller and greater than the self. One contemplates the intrinsic nature of the threshold, the random thoughts which form there and are held within the space, those who traveled the path before us and came to this place and those who are yet to come. When one is thinking kindly of other beings, doorways and thresholds become gates of compassion and realms of Tara.

Most of the thresholds we encounter in our mundane lives are physical objects like gates, doorways, chimneys and windows, but there are times when thresholds are intangible and invisible to the human eye — interstitial moments rather than physical places. These tiny "aways" allow us to transcend ordinary life for a brief intense interval and go somewhere else entirely. Anyone who has ever been carried away entirely by a gnarled tree in a hidden grove, a limpid forest pool, a fey breeze or a wild orchid blooming in a sunlit summer fen knows the feeling very well.

Ours is a winding trail holding wonders and surprises, and whether or not we realize it, we all encounter thresholds from time to time. Sometimes it is only a few steps from here to there. We need such places in our mundane lives in order to survive and evolve, to become authentic beings and exercise the creativity which is our birthright. Thresholds allow us to step out of the ordinary world for a while, and into the rich realm of the archetypal, the strange and the creative.

When one is attuned, the siren voice of the liminal is everywhere. We approach the liminal in our own way and our own time, and the lens through which we filter our experience is a unique and very personal thing. For some of us, the gateway lies through church services and collective ceremonies — for others, it is private prayer, meditation and stillness — for still others, the way is through art, communion with the natural world, carefully crafted rites of passage and the old seasonal festivals.

In my own life, I encounter the liminal in art, books, photography and stillness, in lighted candles and incense, in deep twilight and the perfect shapes of trees, in strong coffee and the keyboard sonatas of Scarlatti, in winter days in the shire when the air is so still that one can hear snow falling among the trees, in herons and loons (anywhere, anytime) and walks through the oak woods in late autumn, in the creaking timbers of old log barns, wood smoke, dark chocolate, good cognac and the fragrances of bergamot, lavender and rosewood.

We Are Light

"I come from nowhere. I come from everywhere. I am one. I am many. I am as we are – eternal, out of time."
Le Cirque de Soleil, Saltimbanco

“We are the Light, open, released over and over again.”
Martha Glessing, Wind Cloud

I am reading (again) the late Martha Glessing’s exquisite autobiographical novel “Wind Cloud”, and light is much on my mind at the moment, particularly in these short November days as sunlight hours wane, and the nights grow longer and longer.

One can't help but rejoice in every dancing mote and ray - the pale sunlight coming through my kitchen window in early morning, moonlight and starlight on these clear cold early winter evenings, firelight in the old brick fireplace downstairs, the warm golden halo of the beeswax candle I light every morning and evening, a wand of smoldering sweetgrass incense in warm darkness. I have just been out to the garden to look at the waxing moon, and its radiance high in the early winter sky bears mute testimony to the power of light to awaken wonder in our lives, to comfort, beguile and sustain us.

Our lives, and the lives of all those with whom we share this planet, the life of the planet itself - all exist in an eternal swirling dance, all of us together, spiraling endlessly round the Sun. We are beings made of light - creatures forged from the dust of long ago stars which once lighted up the heavens and ceased to exist millennia ago. How special we all are are. Within the cells of our present metabolisms are encoded the wisdom of the earth, the stories of ancient cultures, the star knowledge of unknown (as yet) constellations and "The Big Bang" which is thought to have engendered not only this world, but our whole vast universe too.

The stardust of which we are made is in essence recycled matter, having assembled into diverse life forms over and over again, lived and died as those life forms, then dissolved back into the cosmic sea countless times. In our time, “we” have been many things, have worn many shapes and answered to many names. In this lifetime I exist as a tatterdemalion, specific and perhaps unique collection of molecules called Catherine or Cate, but in previous appearances I was someone or something altogether different. To paraphrase Cad Goddheu, or the Battle of the Trees (as it is known in English):

I have been a tree with its roots reaching into the good dark earth,
I have been a lake shining under the morning sun,
I have been a hawk soaring in rapturous flight,
I have been a dolphin dancing in the ocean,
I have been a mountain peak dreaming under the moon.

Diverse spiritual paths, creation tales and mythologies hold out a seamless paradigm in which we are all connected, if we only had the vision and wit to recognize it and conduct ourselves accordingly. Within the non-dualistic paradigms of such cultures and teachings, I am a creature forged out of light and stardust, and once upon a time I may have been a mountain. How lovely that would have been.

Looking Out Across the Valley

On a cool morning, the view across the valley of the Clyde river in the Lanark highlands is sublime. Cassie and I walked these pine clad coves and hills and valleys together for years, and there was something astonishing for us to witness every single time we did: an owl peering at us from the shadows, deer and wild turkeys grazing at dawn, hidden groves of gently nodding bloodroot in late April and early May, wild orchids in June. In an early autumn fog, the view out across the valley is the pure distilled essence of enchantment and wildness, absolutely breathtaking, and it delineates the lovely folkloric expression "over the hills and far away", better than anything else I can think of of offhand.
This year, it is Spencer and I who are walking here together, at least physically. My darling Cassie traveled beyond the fields we know late last summer, but she is here in spirit and dancing along beside us, for she always loved our walks, and she has always loved this place.
In springtime, there are wild orchids blooming under the trees here, early lilies, trilliums and columbines nodding across the sunlit hills; choirs of grosbeaks in summer, endless groves of fiery maples, coppery beeches and golden oaks in autumn, deep stands of fragrant blue-green pine and spruce in winter. The long white season has its own windswept wonders, but it is sometimes difficult to partake of them - the snow is often too deep for easy walking on such treacherous terrain, even on snowshoes. In winter, Spencer and I stand looking out over the hills together, and we dream of making tracks across the pristine waves and billows and endless rolling snow dunes stretching into the distance.
What does one do when grief and sadness wash over her like an endless rolling tide and threaten to drown her in their ceaseless motion? What does she do when she is unable to traverse the wild and healing splendors of her chosen place, her forest of the heart? The answer is simple. She cultivates forbearance, and she looks back. She thinks of the other magical hours spent in these wild places, of clan and tribe and the dear companions who were once here with her and have traveled on ahead to the Elysian fields - she gives thanks for the priceless gift of having known and loved them all.
Forbear and forbearance are lovely words. They spring from the Middle English forberen, thence from the Old English forberan, both meaning to endure or to get through something, and to do so with grace and dignity. When we cultivate forbearance, we are exercising tolerance, patience, charity and restraint in adverse circumstances and times of provocation — we are treating our companions on this circular earthly journey (and ourselves too) with mindfulness, compassion, respect and forgiveness.
One of these days, my gratitude in having known and loved those who have traveled on ahead in the last year or so will conquer the pain of losing them. I cultivate mindfulness and a gentle forbearance, and I wait patiently for that gratitude, knowing beyond the shadow of any doubt that in some measure, I shall be walking these hallowed hills forever, and that my departed companions will be here too and walking along with me. A fine untrammeled wildness dwells in my blood and bones.

Wind From the Sea

Many years ago, I encountered Andrew Wyeth's "Wind from the Sea" in a magazine and sat rapt with the issue in my lap for some time, entranced by the tattered lace curtains blowing in the unseen wind from the sea, by the old window and the rather bleak (in conventional terms anyway) landscape beyond the window.

At the time of my encounter with the painting, I was not old enough to read. I had no idea what the painting was called or who had painted it, but I knew that here was something special, that the moment was a watershed moment, and the image would be with me for all the days of my future life. A child has not the vocabulary to describe such things, but the painting was haunting and magnificent, and it called me out of my child self, into its flowing depths and somewhere else, over the hills and far away. It was compelling; it was stark and somber and poignant beyond words - it was liminal and absolutely magical. I never forgot it, and I have indeed carried the image around with me ever since, all the days of my life.

The subjects of Wyeth's much later (and dreamlike) "Snow Hill" are dancing merrily around a beribboned pole, not a May pole as one might think at first glance, but a winter solstice pole crowned with an evergreen and surrounded by drifts of snow. We cannot see the faces of the six merry dancers, but they were all known to Wyeth as models, and they were friends at various times in his life: Karl and Anna Kuerner, Allan Lynch, Helga Testorf (model for the legendary Helga paintings), Bill Loper and Adam Johnson. There are seven streamers attached to Wyeth's "midwinter pole", and the seventh streamer is reserved for the artist himself.

On the hillside below the pole and dancers is the Kuerner farm near Chadds Ford, Pennsylvania, a place known and much loved by Wyeth in his childhood. In the distance we can see the railway tracks where Wyeth's father (noted illustrator N.C. Wyeth) was killed with his young grandson in 1945. Wyeth said that his father's death was the most tumultuous event of his life and artistic career, and that afterward, the landscape he loved so much took on the qualities of his father for him.

Wyeth also said that the dancers in "Snow Hill" were dancing around the pole in anticipation of his death, noting wryly that he had always been difficult to work with and pose for. The dancers in the painting are in a festive frame of mind to be sure, but I like to think if they are celebrating anything at all, it is Andrew's long and fruitful life, his art and his vision, and not his imminent demise.

To Andrew Wyeth, I owe my early understanding of the grandeur of life and my love of the natural world, an appreciation of the luminous, the magical, the wild and the fey which has nourished and sustained me for almost sixty years. Every trip I have ever taken into the woods with my camera or notebook and pen (or without them) had its genesis in my first encounter with "Winds From the Sea" - every scrap of wonder, every exposure, every entranced and incandescent interval spent tracing shadows, shapes, lineaments and textures in wild places.

A few days ago, Andrew Wyeth died peacefully in his sleep at the ripe old age of ninety-one, and I never had a chance to thank him. How I wish it had been otherwise. He gave me the world and the eyes with which to truly see it. What child could ask for more? Thank you, Andrew, from the bottom of my heart.

January 19, 2009